When Killian Wells emailed me last month about all the newness he was working on for his rebellious, certified vegan and cruelty-free niche perfumery, Xyrena (pronounced zy-rena), I felt like a kid in a candy store. Today’s post is a quick look at some of the strange, weird, and downright outrageous things coming to market this season – plus a sneak peak at what’s to follow.
First of all, I’ve gotta know just when “bae” became a thing. One day it was “boyfriend” or “girlfriend,” then it got shortened to “babe,” and now you barely have to use any syllables at all to refer to your significant other. For the utterly clueless, “bae” is an acronym for “before anyone else” – get it? Used as a noun it’s a great thing to be called, but as a proper noun it’s the name of Killian’s latest fragrance. Bae is another mini-celebrity scent like Pearl Liaison’s Flazéda, this time for Canadian musician and social media personality Sebastian Olzanski. High-school aged and popular on the YouTubes and Instagrams, Olzanski is yet another singing teenage heartthrob from Ontario, like Shawn Mendes and the renowned Biebs before him. Bae is a distinctly masculine, highly likeable and easily agreeable fragrance that opens with bergamot and green notes that almost make me think of celery. With middles notes of clary sage, cedar (highly noticeable), freesia and orange blossoms and base notes of patchouli, musk, amber and vanilla, it’s a perfectly nice men’s fragrance for year-round. Just be careful of spraying on fabrics, the juice has a blue dye that might be prone to staining. Not sure Olzanski’s female followers would be into this, but if Sebastian ever decides to head out to Pride he might be surprised to smell Bae standing just a few feet away – on a float. Like!
But even Bae is nothing compared to the vibrant-green monstrosity called Dark Ride, part of the new Virtual Reality Fragrances collection. It’s the world’s first “thrill ride in a bottle,” meant to capture the water rides of theme parks across America. Announced as “moody” and “intoxicating,” the notes include chlorinated water (!), theatrical fog and pyrotechnics (!!), and a hint of mildew – um, WHAT?! While it has the potential to be a total deal breaker, Dark Ride is a must for thrill-seekers and wind chasers alike. Can you imagine showing up to work with this? If you answered yes, I’d love to know what line of work you do exactly. Dark Ride is just as described, and the result could only be summarized as… synthetically stimulating. It smells like the warm leather seats of a rollercoaster, the cloying sweetness of artificial fog, and disinfectant. Truly, something you don’t smell every day.
Both Bae and Dark Ride are available now on the Xyrena website in Extrait de Parfum and water-based body and room Vibe Spray. All fragrances ship in new shockproof travel cases, and the labels have been updated to allow them to last as long as you can enjoy them. And if you can believe it, Killian is putting the finishing touches on a scent that blows even Dark Ride out of the chlorinated water; keep your eyes peeled for the Nosegasm.com exclusive announcement of a perfume that pushes the envelope well past the point of ‘normal…’ But perhaps I’ve said too much already? Stay tuned.
*Prices true at time of writing.
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